So I wrote about being naked while being the domestic servant to my Owner and His friends who were at the house celebrating the NCAA Men’s Basketball Championships. Yes, some of the people were strangers to me and they were first timers allowed to see how we live.  Yes, I was scared.

Yes, it was scary for me to be that way for most of the events.  During the Final Four, i was only topless because someone said they would prefer that I be that way.  Master-Sir had asked everyone before I arrived home from work and He honors their requests.  No harm, no judgment, no problem.  Everyone is there to have fun and let me be their servant, so I was topless for two games.

In my soul and in my heart, i am a submissive first and an exhibitionist second.  Maybe in a former life, i was a nude dancer or something, i don’t know.  But being naked is natural to me.  But not being naked in front of a group of people i don’t know and especially as a servant or a slave.  Being naked in that form hits my humiliation buttons more than my exhibitionist buttons.  But I am always asked how I do it.  Get naked and serve for people i don’t know?

I guess part of it comes from my growing up as an overweight girl.  Always being pointed at, whispered about, and being made fun of for how i looked or dressed.  I just learned to ignore the chants, the calls, and the ugly stares. learning to block them out. I knew if I let them win, I was going to spend my life being ashamed of who i am and what i look like.  Thankfully i found the one person who took what i am and used that to make me a better person.  A better slave.

Master-Sir tells me to get naked, i love, trust and honor Him, so i block out what i call the “Gods of fear” and i just obey.  I close my eyes, swallow my fears, then get naked before i step into the room to fulfill the command given to me by my Owner.  The only person who has any say on what i think about, what i am doing or what i look like.

Trust me, I know i make it sounds easy.  Especially, after all these years of being Owned and even more years living with my weight and the social stigma of that.  I still have that fear of rejection, fear of being shunned or ignored.  But thankfully all the wonderful people Master-Sir surrounds us with are not that way.  They don’t seem prejudice or judgmental.  They all seem to enjoy having a naked fluffy woman at their beck and call.  They enjoy seeing my boobs bounce as I run into the other room to fetch them a new ash tray or a fresh drink.  Maybe one of them left their cell phone in the upstairs bathroom, could I get it?  Yes mam, on my way.  Thank you Mama for letting me get that for you.

Maybe it’s the fact that once i suck it all in and enter the house as the Domestic Slave, i am too busy to think about what i look like or what they think of me.  I bury it all, hoping i am serving them well and they are telling my Owner that they really appreciate my services and my obedience to serve them.  Maybe they are telling Him how the house looks so nice and clean, wondering how He does it all? He does it because He has a dedicated slave to make His life worth living.

I do know that I have heard some of the compliments.  The ones where they tell me or my Owner that they feel so out of place, like they hit the lottery or were invited to a famous person’s home for a party because it is so well planned and functional.  Almost like it was catered.  They just have to show up and enjoy.  No worrying about where the food is, the bathroom or getting a fresh drink because I always seem to be there for them.   I like that.

Then the fears come back to haunt me.  As if they don’t notice the naked domestic servant or that i am naked.  But i know they do.  I feel the looks. not bad looks, but looks that i am there and i am not dressed like them.  i feel the hand secretly feeling my ass or my boob as i turn.  Or the one who wants to show off to a familiar friend who wants to see if i am shaved clean or wet (yes, I am). I will stand and part my legs, thanking them for noticing that I am wet. By this point, I am usually beyond wet, I am soaking. But they are smiling to find that my pussy is smooth and my breasts are soft. My ass is clean and ready to be used. All the while others are standing around, look on.  But none of its bad in any way.

Yet, i am fighting my internal demons and the fears. It’s not as easy as it sounds to be naked in that room with strangers.  because no matter how long i have been doing this, they are still there. wondering and worried about what other people will think or say.  After it is all done and they are gone, i am mentally drained because i was trying so hard not to think about what others may have thought about that naked fat girl, and how dare she be so happy to be fat and naked around us normal people!

I need to only worry about what my Owner thinks. It’s not that easy. However, Blocking out the fears works…  But it is exhausting! Seriously exhausting!